October 11, 2012

I'm Not Who You Think I Am

     A couple months ago something that a close friend said to me once, that hurt me, resurfaced again. Because of what she said, I felt completely worthless as a follower of God, I felt that I was unable to do anything of worth and would never make any difference. My point? Words hurt.
     I don't know if it is because I am a writer, but words just stick with me. There is some way that words just never go away from me. I'll always be battleing with words that hurt, and I wonder if you are like me too.
     I decided to write a letter to the person that hurt me. Even though I was not able to give the letter to my friend, it helped me to defeat those words, or should I call it that curse? Words have more power than one might think. With the 20,000 words a day that we say each day, it's likely if we don't walk with the knowledge that words are powerful, we might hurt someone. Here's what God says about the power of words:

 
 The tongue has the power of life and death,
    and those who love it will eat its fruit.
-Proverbs 18:21

 The words of the reckless pierce like swords,
    but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
-Provers 12:18

 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
 -Ephesians 4:29


I hope my letter to Anonymous will help you in your own battle against the words of others. 


~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Dear Anonymous, 



     I will not succumb. I cannot be beat by your thoughts that you thoughtlessly said aloud, and which hurt me. They hurt me. Yes, they did hurt me, and they still do. Did you think they wouldn't? 
     There is a heart beneath my cheerfulness; there is a knowledge in the dreaminess. To you, I view life to be all made up of elves, fairies, and rainbows. It is not. Witches exist in life too. I may dream, and I may look like I have no care- but I do. How dare you hurt me. I am not naive- just pure. As I dream I observe the serious things of life.
     Those fairies die too. They are not mortal. Through stories I learn of life and death. I also learn of hurt and I learn of truth. I know of good and how it ultimately will win over wickedness. Why else have I chosen to follow the Lord God Almighty? 
     Yes, good wins over evil. That is why you won't beat me. I will rise up past your words- and I will be victorious. As I sit here in despair because of my wounds- I look forward to when my God wins. I will be all my God wants of me, so that He will say well done when He is the world's Victor. Will He say that to you?
     I know of what effect evil has on this world. What you don't know is that good has more effect than evil. Little goods can effect big evils. Why else would authors make little fairies win against witches? My heart can effect the power of your judgement. My pen can beat evil. 
     You say my talent for poetry is finally something that makes me worth something? I say it is a culmination of who I am. I say I had it all along, only getting more added to it so that I can impact God's Kingdom with my talent.
     Who I am is not bound by your words. Who I am is not bound by anyone's words. I am someone who can vanquish evil. Actually, I am someone who has done that from the time I received Christ as my Savior from sin.

Forever His,
    Brooke



PS. I forgive you. You didn't know what you did.